I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
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