I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Randomize
