I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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