i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
