Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
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