just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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