You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
