spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Randomize
