well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Randomize
