The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize
