I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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