"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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