I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
