Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
