I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
So vagazzling was a success
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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