I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
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