wake up i wanna do it froggy style
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
