It's like God shit irony all over that family
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
