I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
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