I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
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