Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
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