I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
