God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Randomize
