i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
