U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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