Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
