guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
