Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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