She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Someone signed my nipple.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
