I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
