i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
My pussy is not your playground.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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