Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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