After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Randomize
