I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Randomize
