I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
