My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Randomize
