this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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