hotel room ftw
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
