so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
