you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
