i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
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