On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize