Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(419): View more from Ohio

there is no way he can be that small

(1-419): View more from Ohio

look on the bright side he'll over comepensate

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(216): View more from Ohio

ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.

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(904): View more from Florida

i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me

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(443): View more from Maryland

I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.

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(207): View more from Maine

he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation

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(774): View more from Massachusetts

i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.

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(845): View more from New York

YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE

(1-914): View more from New York

YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.

(845): View more from New York

I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

Help me help you realize you are a moron

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