hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
