so explain again why im purple
no
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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