once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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