Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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