we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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