When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
