I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
We left the knife in your bed.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
